Submitted by J, L, CR & TJ Morrison
Your friend compliments you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.
You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
A young babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.
"Getting a little action" means, "I don't need to take any fiber today."
You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of the police.
An "all nighter" means not getting up to go use the bathroom!
"Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.
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